Without a doubt, Mondays suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to A:MO/GN Desss at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

HIGHWAY PATROLMAN

A Highway Patrolman waited outside a popular local bar, hoping for a bust. At closing time, as everyone come out he spotted his potential quarry. The man was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, looking for his car. After trying his keys on five other cars, he finally found his own vehicle.

He sat in the car a good ten minutes, as the other patrons left. He turned his light on, then off, wipers on, then off. He started to pull forward into the grass, then stopped. Finally, when he was the last car, he pulled out onto the road and started to drive away.
The patrolman, waiting for this, turned on his lights and pulled the man over. He administered the breathalyzer test, and to his great surprise, the man blew a 0.00.

The patrolman was dumbfounded. "This equipment must be broken!" exclaimed the patrolman.
"I doubt it," said the man, Tonight I am the designated decoy!"

THE PUNISHMENT

There was once a very inspirational preacher, but he had a tremendous weakness for golf. Every chance he could get, he could be found on the golf course swinging away. It was an obsession for him.

One Sunday was a picture perfect day for golfing. The sun was out, no clouds in the sky, and the temperature was just right. The preacher was in a quandary as to what to do, and shortly, the urge to play golf overcame him. He called an assistant to tell him that he was sick and could not do church, packed the car up, and drove three hours to a golf course where no one would recognize him. Happily, he began to play the course.

An angel up above was watching the preacher and was quite perturbed. She went to God and said, 'Look at the preacher. He should be punished for what he is doing.' God nodded in agreement.

The preacher teed up on the first hole. He swung at the ball, and it sailed effortlessly through the air and landed right in the cup three hundred and fifty yards away. Wow! A picture perfect hole-in-one. He was amazed and ecstatic.

The angel was a little shocked. She turned to God and said, 'Begging Your pardon, but I thought you were going to punish him.'

The Lord smiled and said, 'Think about it -- who can he tell about his perfect hole-in-one?'

Well that's it for this week folks. I would like to thank Colonel Jaeger for his submissions. Be sure to check back as I will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

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