Without a doubt, Monday's suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to A:MO/BG Rendl Dronshed at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

ONE NIGHT...

A priest and nun are on their way back home from a convention when their car breaks down. They are unable to get repairs completed and it appears that they will have to spend the night in a motel. The only motel in this town has only one room available so they have a minor problem.

PRIEST: Sister, I don't think the Lord would have a problem, under the circumstances, if we spent the night together in this one room. I'll sleep on the couch and you take the bed.

SISTER: I think that would be okay.

They prepare for bed and each one takes their agreed place in the room.

Ten minutes later...

SISTER: Father, I'm terribly cold.

PRIEST: Okay, I'll get up and get you a blanket from the closet.

Ten minutes later...

SISTER: Father, I'm still terribly cold.

PRIEST: Okay Sister, I'll get up and get you another blanket.

Ten minutes later...

SISTER: Father, I'm still terribly cold. I don't think the Lord would
mind if we acted as man and wife just for this one night.

PRIEST: You're probably right... Get up and get your own blanket.

HEAVEN AND HELL

Heaven: An American salary. A British home. Chinese food. A Japanese wife.
Hell: A Chinese salary. A Japanese home. British food. An American wife.

Heaven is where the Lovers are Italian, the Engineers are German, the Police are British, and it is all managed by the Swiss.
Hell is where the Lovers are Swiss, the Engineers are British, the Police are German, and it is all managed by the Italians.

ARE COMPUTERS MALE OR FEMALE?

Five reasons to believe computers are female:

• 1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
• 2. Even the smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory.
• 3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to anyone else.
• 4. The message "bad command or file name" is about as informative as, "If you don't know what is wrong, then I'm not going to tell you."
• 5. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Five reasons to believe computers are male:

• 1. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
• 2. A better model is right around the corner.
• 3. They look attractive -- until you take them home.
• 4. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
• 5. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

Well that's it for this week folks. Be sure to check back as we will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

I would like to thank Barlee Bre for sending the Morale Office all these funny anecdotes as she does every week. We finally found a use for them.

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created by Brigadier General Dronshed