Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together,
they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother.
The first said, "I built a big house for our mother."
The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver."
The third smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You remember how mom enjoyed reading the Bible?
And you know she can't see very well. So I sent her a remarkable parrot that
recites the entire Bible. It took elders in the church 12 years
to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse,
and the parrot recites it."
Soon thereafter, mom sent out her letters of thanks:
"Milton," she wrote one son, "The house you built is so huge. I live in only one room,
but I have to clean the whole house."
"Gerald," she wrote to another, "I am too old to travel. I stay most of the time at home,
so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!"
"Dearest Donald," she wrote to her third son,
"You have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious."
A man on his way home from work at the Pentagon came to a dead halt in traffic and thought to himself,
"Wow, this traffic seems worse than usual. Nothing's even moving."
He noticed a police officer walking back and forth between the lines of cars so he rolled down his window and asked, "Excuse me, Officer,
what's the hold up?"
"The President just found out Starr delivered his report to the Congress and he's all
depressed. He stopped his motorcade in the middle of the Freeway and he's threatening to douse himself
in gasoline and set himself on fire. He says his family hates him and he doesn't have the $33.5 million he
owes his lawyers. I'm walking around taking up a collection for him."
"Oh really? How much have you collected so far?"
"Oh about three hundred gallons high octane."
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"
Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Your Mom, she's the administrator of
the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the
People. The nanny, we'll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the
Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense."
So the little boy goes off to bed thinking
about what Dad has said Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him.
He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room and finds
his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked,
he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.
The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now." The
father says, "Good, son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about." The little boy
replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the
People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."