Without a doubt, Monday's suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to A:MO/LG Rendl Dronshed at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

HILLARY IN HEAVEN
Submitted by Captain Emerald

Hillary Clinton dies and goes to Heaven. When she reaches the Pearly Gates she notices that there are clocks everywhere. Big, and small, and all shapes and sizes and colours. So she asks Saint Peter, "Peter, why are there so many clocks in eternity? Why do you need to keep track of time in here?"
Peter answers her "Well, those clocks don't track time, my child. They keep track of adultery. Each time a person on earth commits adultery their clock ticks forward a tiny bit."
Hillary thinks to herself for a second and then asks, "May I see my husband's Bill's clock?"
Peter replies, "Since your husband was president, he has a most magnificent and beautiful clock. But I'm afraid I can't let you see it. God keeps Bill's clock in his own room...And uses it as a fan."

SPECIAL MIRROR
Submitted by Colonel Thrawn

Legend has it that there is a bar in New York where, in the Ladies' Room, there is a very special mirror. If one stands in front of the mirror and tells the truth, one is granted a wish. However, if one tells a lie,*POOF* you are instantly swallowed up by the mirror, never to be
seen again.
A redhead of questionable looks walks into the Ladies Room and stands before the mirror and says, "I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world."
*POOF* The mirror swallows her.
Next, a rather large brunette stands before the mirror and says, "I think I'm the sexiest woman alive!
*POOF* The mirror swallows her.
Then an absolutely gorgeous blonde comes in and stands before the mirror and says, "I think..."
*POOF*

THE AIRPLANE TOOK OFF...
Submitted by Colonel Thrawn

The airplane took off with a full load of passengers. Ten minutes into the flight the loud speaker announced:
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen. You are privileged to be riding on the very first pilotless flight. Do not panic. This flight is backed by the finest technology in the world today. It has been planned by the United States Army and is sanctioned by the United States Government. Absolutely nothing can go wrong go wrong go wrong go wrong...

Well that's it for this week folks. I would like to thank Colonel Thrawn and Captain Emerald for their submissions. Be sure to check back as I will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

RETURN TO THE MORALE OFFICE MAIN PAGE

created by Lieutenant General Dronshed