Without a doubt, Monday's suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to HC:MO/RA Rendl Dronshed at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

THE VIRGIN
Submitted by Colonel Thrawn

There was this virgin that was going out on a date for the first time and she told her grandmother about it. So, the grandmother says, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys.
He is going to try to kiss you, you are going to like that but, don't let him do that.
He is going to try to feel your breast, you are going to like that but, don't let him do that.
He is going to try to put his hand between your legs; you are going to like that but, don't let him do that. 
But most important, he is going to try to get on top of you and have his way with you. You are going to like that but, don't let him do that, it will disgrace the family."

With that bit of advise, the granddaughter went on her date and could not wait to tell her grandmother about it.
So, the next day she told her grandmother that her date went just like she said.
But she said to her grandmother, "I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried I turned
over, got on top of him and disgraced his family."

GOD CAME TO ADAM TO PASS ON SOME GOOD NEWS...
Submitted by Colonel Thrawn

One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news", God said.
Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first."
Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and have intelligent conversations with Eve.
The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children."
Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"
God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time.

PHONE HOME
Submitted by Colonel Thrawn

A guy dials his home to speak to his wife and the maid answers. She says that missus is busy right now. The guy insists that she go get her anyway. The maid embarassed, says that the missus is busy with her lover in her bedroom!
The guy goes ballistic and tells the maid to listen very carefully: "Go to the basement, get my rifle, then go to the bedroom and shoot them both."
The maid stutters that she can't do that, but finally agrees after the guy tells her that she's fired otherwise. She puts the phone down. The guy listens and a few moments later he hears : BANG! BANG!.
The maid comes back an and says that it's done. The guy says: "OK, now listen carefully once more. Drag the bodies downstairs and dump them in the pool."
The maid stutters her disapproval.
The guys says: "Listen, you're fired if you don't do what I say!"
The maid says: "But sir we don't have a pool."
The guy says : "Is this 872-1286?"

Well that's it for this week folks. I would like to thank Colonel Thrawn for his submissions. Be sure to check back as I will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

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