Without a doubt, Monday's suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to HC:MO/VA Rendl Dronshed at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

A MISSIONARY WAS WALKING IN AFRICA...

A missionary was walking in Africa when he heard the ominous padding of a lion behind him. "Oh Lord," prayed the missionary, "Grant in Thy goodness that the lion walking behind me is a good Christian lion."

And then, in the silence that followed, the missionary heard the lion praying too: "Oh Lord," he prayed, "We thank Thee for the food which we are about to receive."

TOP TEN REJECTED SLOGANS FOR FORD

10. "Where quality is job...what, maybe 5...or 6."
9. "You might be a big class-action winner!"
8. "Ford: Because life is too predictable."
7. "Our cars are built with love because our assembly-line workers enjoy unlimited cocktails."
6. "One out of every 50 glove compartments contains an abandoned newborn!"
5. "Turn the key; cross your fingers."
4. "They may be fiery death traps, but they're American-made fiery death traps!"
3. "If you have a better idea, could you send it to us?"
2. "You know how they say you should live everyday as if it's your last?"
1. "Wouldn't you rather take the bus?"

SLEEPING IN THE CHURCH

A man who went to church with his wife always fell asleep during the sermon. One Sunday, the wife decided to do something about it, so she picked up a long hat pin and took it with her to church.
While sitting in church, the wife noticed that her husband was once again falling asleep, and as the preacher got to a part in the sermon where he shouted out "... and who created all there is in 6 days?".
She poked her husband who jumped from the pew and shouted, "Good God all mighty!"
The minister looked at the man and said, "That's right, that's right," and he continued with the sermon. The man sat back down, muttering under his breath.
Later on, once again the man began to doze off, and just as the minister reached "...and who died on the cross to save us from our sins?" the wife again poked her husband, and he leaped from the pew and shouted, "Jesus Christ!"
The minister again looked at the man and said, "That's right, that's right," and went on with the sermon. The man sat back down, and gave his wife an angry look. Even so, the man was tired and ten minutes later he was feeling incredibly sleepy, so he closed his eyes and leaned his head back. His wife noticed that he was about to fall asleep again, so she pulled out the hat pin, and just as the minister said, "...and what did Eve say to Adam after the birth of their second child?" she poked him as hard as she could.
The man sprang from the pew and shouted, "If you stick me with that thing again I'm going to break it in two!"

Well that's it for this week folks. I would like to thank for the submissions. Be sure to check back as I will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

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created by Vice Admiral Dronshed