Without a doubt, Monday's suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to HC:MO/VA Rendl Dronshed at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

A BLIND MAN...

A blind man was standing on the corner with his dog when the dog raised his leg and wet on the man's trouser leg. The man reached in his pocket and took out a doggie biscuit. A busybody who had been watching ran up to him and said, "You shouldn't do that. He'll never learn anything if you reward him when he does something like that!".
The blind man retorted, "I'm not rewarding him. I'm just trying to find his mouth so that I can kick him in the ass".

WHAT NOT TO NAME YOUR DOG

Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy." I call mine Sex.

Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one, too." Then I said,"But this is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "But you don't understand. I've had Sex since I was nine years old." He said I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said every room in the place was for sex. I said, "You don't understand. Sex keeps me awake at night!" The clerk said, "Me too."

One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. "But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on TV." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight custody of the dog. I said, "Your honor, I had Sex before I was married." The judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, "Me too."

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at 4:00 in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for Sex."

My case comes up Friday.

TRUE LOVE

A young man truly in love with his girlfriend decided to have her name tattooed on his penis, her name was Wendy, and the tattoo was done while the penis was erect, so when it was not erect all you could see was W Y. Shortly after the couple was married they were honeymooning in Jamaica the man was in a bathroom in Jamaica, and standing next to him was a Jamaican man who also had a W Y   on his penis.  The American said to him "Oh is your girl named Wendy too?" The Jamaican replied, "No, Mon that says Welcome To Jamaica Have a Nice Day".

Well that's it for this week folks. I would like to thank for the submissions. Be sure to check back as I will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

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created by Vice Admiral Dronshed