Without a doubt, Mondays suck. Here at the Morale Office, we would like to try and make your Monday's just a little more bearable, by giving you a laugh to get you through the week. Therefore, every Sunday, the Morale Office will be posting a new joke, anecdote, or humourous comment on our Weekly Laugh Page, just to put a smile on your face and strength to fight yourself through the upcoming week.

If you have one such joke, something to put a smile on your fellow Imperials' faces, a bright note to start the week, then please forward it to HC:MO/AD Rendl Dronshed at [email protected]. After all we always need a good laugh!

WHY COFFEE IS BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.
2. You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee.
3. You can always warm coffee up.
4. Coffee comes with endless refills.
5. Coffee is cheaper.
6. Coffee never runs out.
7. Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning.
8. Coffee smells and tastes good.
9. If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel.
10. You can turn the pot on, leave the room, and it'll be hot when you get back.
11. You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee.
12. A big cup or small cup? It doesn't matter.
13. Coffee stains are easier to remove.
14. Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less.
15. Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide to have a cup.
16. Instant Coffee!
17. When coffee gets old, you can throw it away.
18. Your coffee won't be jealous of a larger cup.

BAD GOLFERS

A foursome was on the last hole and when the last golfer drove off the tee he hooked into a cow pasture. He advised his friends to play through and he would meet them at the clubhouse. They followed the plan and waited for their friend.

After a considerable time he appeared disheveled, bloody, and badly beaten up. They all wanted to know what happened. He explained that he went over to the cow pasture but could not find his ball. He noticed a cow wringing her tail in obvious pain. He went over and lifted her tail and saw a golf ball solidly embedded. It was a yellow ball so he knew it was not his.

A woman comes out of the bushes apparently searching for her lost golf ball. The helpful male golfer lifted the cow's tail and asked, "Does this look like yours?"
That was the last thing he could remember.

THE BIG SALE

It was the day of the big sale. Rumours of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store's opening time, in front of the store.

A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colourful curses. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown to the end of the line again.

As he got up the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line. "That does it! If they hit me one more time, I don't open the store!"

Well that's it for this week folks. I would like to thank for the submissions. Be sure to check back as I will be updating this page weekly. And don't forget to send your suggestions in.

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created by Admiral Dronshed